Wednesday, April 14, 2004

Waffles

Go and see The Ladykillers. Absolutely. It’s ridiculous.

“Madam, We must have waffles! We must all have waffles forthwith! We must think, and we must all have waffles, and think each and everyone of us to the best of his ability.”
“Not to beat a horse that, if not dead, has been flogged to a point of being mortally wounded”
and
“You brought your bitch to the Waffle Hut?”

join

“You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me. Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon... with nail polish.”
“Nihilists! Fuck me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it's an ethos.”
“What the fuck are you talking about? The chinaman is not the issue here, dude. I'm talking about drawing a line in the sand, dude. Across this line, you DO NOT... Also, dude, chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature. Asian-American, please.”
“Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules.”
“Phone's ringing, Dude.”
“Well, Pete, there are all manner of lesser imps and demons, but the great Satan hisself is red and scaly with a bifurcated tail, and he carries a hay fork.”
“Or, if not smithies per se, were you otherwise trained in the metallurgic arts before straitened circumstances forced you into a life of aimless wanderin'?”
“We thought you was a toad.”
“Those boys desecrated a burning cross!”
“I'm not sure I agree with you a hundred percent on your police work, there, Lou.”
“However, just at the moment, I have drinking to do. Why don't you stop by my bungalow, which is number fifteen, later on this afternoon, and we will discuss rasslin' scenarios and other things lit'rary.”
“Biology and other peoples' opinions conspired to keep us childless.”
“There's right and there's right and never the t'wain shall meet.”
“Well could you describe the jammies?” -- “I don't what is damn jammies looked like... they had Yodas and shit on them.”
and
“We figured there was too much happiness here for just the two of us, so we figured the next logical step was to have us a critter.”

among the Coen’s best-ever lines.

And if you’re substantially bored, check out imdb for a ridiculous string of comments applying “waffles” to other classic movie lines and characters. “Say hello to my little waffle” and “We don’t need no stinking waffles” are among the funniest ones.