No longer sweatin'

In all fairness, I ought to update the Richard Simmons uber-scandal.
Arrested at Phoenix's Sky Harbor Airport in March, the exercise guru (well, not really, but who's splittin' hairs?) is now free and clear.

PHOENIX - A Phoenix city court judge has dismissed an assault charge against exercise guru Richard Simmons stemming from a March incident at Phoenix Sky Harbor International Airport in which he allegedly slapped an ultimate cage fighter across the face.
The cage wrestler, identified as Christopher Farney, agreed to drop the misdemeanor charge against Simmons, according to court documents filed May 19. The court records did not indicate why Farney agreed to the dismissal. Simmons, the outlandish 55-year-old known for his nationally distributed exercise videos, was accused of slapping the 6-foot-2, 250-pound athlete after the man reportedly made a derogatory remark about Simmons as they waited to board a flight on March 24.

I wish the cage fighter would have hit back. It would have been such a better story:
Excercise super-guru Richard Simmons was seriously injured at Sky Harbor Airport after starting a fight with an ultimate cage fighter...
I never did hear if David Letterman picked up on the story...